March is named after Mars, the ultimate Roman warrior of heroic actions. Surrendering and letting go are actions of personal strength and power – not defeat.
1. Observe Compulsive Thoughts
Thoughts stalk you in your sleep, at a party, or while hiking with friends. They beat you to the office before you begin the workday. They loom over you during conversations with loved ones.
ACTION: Observe your compulsive thoughts with curiosity as they stream through your mind. Let them come and go without personalizing, resisting, or identifying with them. Eventually they float away.
2. Go Wide – Bird’s Eye View
When you’re going through something difficult it isn’t always a personal failure nor permanent. By taking a wider view, you can see more possibilities than obstacles.
ACTION: Identify the opportunity within your difficulty by asking, “how can I turn this situation round?” or “how can I put this situation in the context of the bigger picture?”
3. Befriend your Inner Critic
The inner voice inside your head can be like a drill sergeant who wants to save his soldiers’ lives, the Critic’s job is to point out your failures so you don’t get your head blown off in combat
ACTION: Don’t try to get rid of your Inner Critic. Develop a relationship – it takes time. Listen to your inner voice as a separate of you, not all of you. Nurture your inner voice with goodhearted affirmations like a friend would.
4. Forget your Free Pass
Many of us give more tender loving care to our jobs than our loved ones. No matter how much money you make or how hard you work, you don’t get a free pass for not being accountable to your personal life.
ACTION: Treat loved ones humanely. Be respectful of their time and emotional needs. Think about hurtful habits you need to amend to be a more loving human being.
5. Be Positive
Positivity isn’t drinking some magical joy juice or wearing rose-colored glasses. It stretches your mind open to take in as much information as you can and widens the array of possibilities. While negativity keeps you focused on the problem, a positive approach allows you to focus on solutions.
ACTION: Practice looking for the silver lining in situations you label as negative. Build a habit of looking at the big picture.
6. Recognize you’re Good Enough
You work through holidays or miss family events – all in attempts to be good enough with work tasks.
ACTION: What if you drop the illusion that some work task will make you feel good enough? Welcome self-compassion and allow it to overtake you, knowing that everything is possible and everything is unknown until you start to live it.
Credits: B. Robinson’s book, Turn off Your Job and Turn on Your Life – I wanted to share my 6 takeaways on the art of letting go.
